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Aimee Smith - Rest in the Trench

Helping homeschool moms cultivate victorious rest

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How to Escape the Mental Weight of Homeschool Life

4 Apr

Awake in the middle of the night. Again. Thoughts ravage my weary mind as I desperately seek the safety of sleep.

Needs and expectations of others overwhelm my sleepless self. I need to… I should have… I haven’t… I still don’t know…

Everything feels worse at 2am. 

I repeat the Truth I know I need: I am pressed, but not crushed. 

 

“We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed.”

II Corinthians 4:8-9 (NIV)

God’s Word rolls through my brain on autopilot. Perhaps it’s the Holy Spirit. Perhaps it’s the result of years of training myself to memorize and repeat Scripture. Probably both. But the overwhelming mental pressure persists.

When I wake, the pressing needs remain reality even in the light of day.

So I once again repeat Truth: I am pressed, but not crushed.

But I still feel captive. And the captivity threatens to crush me.

How does your reality threaten to crush you? 

It’s ok to admit our reality. As homeschool moms, reality is hard. Homeschooling is not a field of daisies and series of blog-worthy photos. We have accepted a nearly impossible mission. Some days, this mission overwhelms even the best of moms in a crushing reality.

We are pressed. 

Hard pressed on all sides. Troubled with demands, wants, and needs. Demands from family, extended relationships, and our own expectations. Wants, desires, and preferences from our children – all different, and all at the same time. Valid needs for education, health, and character development.

Yes, we should release many expectations of ourselves.

But reality remains: The life of a homeschool mom will remain pressed from all sides.

We are perplexed. 

These wants and needs demand we make some decisions. Constantly. Which curriculum and activities? When to schedule the appointments? How to shepherd this heart issue? The harder they press, the more perplexed we become. We swirl in doubt, waver between paths, and seek elusive resources.

Yes, we should choose to trust God to guide us.

But reality remains: The mind of a homeschool mom will live with constant perplexing decisions.

We are persecuted.

We tend to skip identifying with this word. Christians around the world and throughout history have truly been persecuted, severely mistreated for following Jesus. But settle here for a moment with this Greek word rich with meaning. dioko. Amid other aspects, persecute can mean “to make to run or flee, to put to flight”.

Are you ever tempted to flee from pressing responsibilities and perplexing decisions? Perhaps fear, self-condemnation, and despair are part of the Ephesians 6 battle and reality of an internal persecution.

Yes, we should stand strong and courageous.

But reality remains: The emotions of a homeschool mom will be tempted to flee.

We are struck down. 

Perhaps we hide in the bathroom and eat chocolate. Perhaps we avoid making the hard decisions. Perhaps we just sit on the sofa and watch TV. Or scroll social media.

Most times this phrase occurs in Scripture, struck down simply means “killed”. The Lord struck down the firstborn of the Egyptians. Israel’s army struck down their enemies. Perhaps our dreams of a fruitful homeschool should simply die.

Yes, we should cling to long-term hope.

But reality remains: The dreams of a homeschool mom will be struck down. (Have you ever been tempted to quit?)

How can you escape the captivity of your crushing reality?

Pressed, but not crushed.

Perplexed, but not despairing.

Persecuted, but not abandoned.

Struck down, but not destroyed.

Redefine your ministry.

“Therefore, since we have this ministry…we do not lose heart.” II Corinthians 4:1

What is the Christian homeschool mom’s ministry?  Your ministry is evident in your choices to soothe with compassion beyond a band-aid, to return to the defiant heart with humility over your initial response, to worship even as your life seems to unravel.

You are a minister of the new covenant. A covenant of the Spirit rather than the letter of the law. A covenant of life rather than death. (II Cor. 3:6)

You are shaping a soul to receive the grace of Jesus, not to achieve a standard of performance.

Offer your broken vessel.

“But we have this treasure in earthen vessels (jars of clay), so that the surpassing greatness of the power will be of God and not from ourselves.” II Corinthians 4:7

Do you really want to do everything right as a homeschool mom? Or do you desire for your family and others to see God’s power on display? When you are pressed, perplexed, persecuted, and struck down, it’s the perfect backdrop for God to showcase His glory.

You are a broken vessel. Oh, but that is precisely who God wants as a palate for creating His work of beauty.

You are offering yourself as a sacrifice of praise, not as a martyr of stubborn pride.

Search for the unseen.

“…while we look not at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen; for the things which are seen are temporal, but the things which are not seen are eternal.” II Corinthians 4:18

Will you dare to believe your current source of significant stress is exactly where God is already moving? Will you search for light in the darkness, for morning in the midst of night, for joy in grief, for hope in despair?

You are royalty.  It is the honor of kings to search out a matter, especially when it reveals God’s hidden glory? (Proverbs 25:2)

You are seeking the eternal glory of God Himself, not the temporal praise of visible success.

We can escape the constant mental pressing.

Will you choose to live the but not?

Yes, reality is hard. But it need not crush you.

1. Redefine your ministry to remember you are leading your children to receive grace rather than to achieve perfection.

2. Offer yourself, a broken vessel, as a sacrifice of praise to display God’s power and beauty.

3. Search for the unseen eternal glory in the midst of your current struggle.

You might be pressed. But you can choose to not be crushed.

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aimeesmith.restinthetrench

Homeschooling... Seeking rest in chaos... Persevering through chronic illness... Tenaciously worshiping in trials... Clinging to Jesus through it all.

aimeesmith.restinthetrench
After a decade of homeschooling, I wonder if I'll After a decade of homeschooling, I wonder if I'll ever be consistent. Our homeschool story consists of one disruption after another life interruption. I often wonder, "if only I could be consistent..."
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I have discovered something far better. God is constant. He's the same yesterday, today, and forever. You see, my consistency places the weight of success or failure on my shoulders, but God hasn't asked me to produce a successful homeschool. He has called me to praise and trust Him.
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"My heart is steadfast, O God, my heart is steadfast. I will sing, yes, I will sing praises!" (Psalm 57:7)
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God's constancy overshadows my consistency, or lack thereof. So I will sing His praise, and my heart will be steadfast. That's what my family really needs anyway: Mom's steadfast heart.
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#restfulhomeschool #restinthetrench #homeschoolburnout #homeschoolprayers #homeschoolmom #homeschoolstruggles
We may not know what's ahead. . We may not know wh We may not know what's ahead.
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We may not know which direction to turn.
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But we know the One who walks with us all along the way.
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(If you aren't confident you're walking with Jesus, if you're unable to find peace, please reach out. I would love to talk with you.)
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#restfulhomeschool #homeschoolburnout #homeschoolprayers #homeschoolmom #homeschooldevotions
What if being still is a prerequisite for knowing What if being still is a prerequisite for knowing God?
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For really knowing Him. For truly believing He WILL be exalted in all the earth. For being able to relax and rest knowing all will be ok.
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"(God) says, 'Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth.'" Psalm 46:10
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What if the AND is really a SO?
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Be still SO you *can* know. Be still in order to KNOW. .
He is God.
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Maybe this is part of why God instructs us to rest.
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#restfulhomeschool #homeschoolprayers #homeschoolmom #homeschooldevotions #homeschoolburnout #homeschoolencouragement #homeschoolstruggles
I might have a problem. What are you reading? . #r I might have a problem. What are you reading?
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#restfulhomeschool #homeschoolmom #homeschoolbooks
Wait. . Is this the story of our entire lives righ Wait.
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Is this the story of our entire lives right now? Why do we have such desire for something beyond the current moment? What are we waiting for?
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My mind, as yours I expect,  is filled with many unanswered questions and much uncertainty. And so we wait.
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As we wait, let's keep our focus.
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Psalm 53:9 - "I will wait on Your Name for it is good."
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Wait on Jesus. He is good.
"Restore to me the JOY of your salvation." Psalm 5 "Restore to me the JOY of your salvation." Psalm 51:12a
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Every morning. I need His restoration.
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Every morning. He gives us His Word. He offers renewal. He restores our joy.
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What did you read in God's Word today?
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#restinthetrench #restfulhomeschool #homeschoolprayers
No gatherings for worship or fellowship today. Clo No gatherings for worship or fellowship today. Clouds instead of a glorious sunrise. A threat of major storms here in the southeast. Jesus, why couldn't we at least have a beautiful day? What are You trying to accomplish?
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A few minutes in Luke 24 reveals the first Easter wasn't all glorious either. People were filled with confusion, fear, and doubt.
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Women arrived at the tomb early to serve Jesus. Peter ran to the tomb only to return with confused answers. Men walking to Emmaus encountered a puzzling stranger.
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Until they each had a personal encounter with Jesus Himself. He explained the Scriptures, opened their eyes, and gave understanding to their minds.
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Jesus gave them peace, promise, and an expectation of power. .
Their world continued in unrest, but they were changed.
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How will Jesus' peace, promise, and power change us today?
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